Why you should IGNORE the “rules” when planning your Wedding

Just call me the Anti-Bride.

Make a mental note of ALLLLL the rules you’ve ever heard about planning a wedding. Now take that note, ball it up, rip it in two, and throw it in the fire…because they don’t matter.

With 39 days and counting until I wed my bald bearded chocolate thunda, the best way to describe my approach to planning has been “unconventional.” 

***Disclaimer #1: I will say “I plan” alot in this post because, lets be honest….majority of grooms don’t care about wedding planning and my fiancé is no exception.

I have a good handful of married friends, each that had a different and beautiful wedding. One was beach glam, one was farmhouse romance, and another was the ultimate fairy tale(that I missed because Rulon was late). But from the time I started planning our wedding, I realized one very important rule of engagement…the wedding is ONLY for the bride and groom. I will repeat that in case you didn’t read it correctly: THE WEDDING IS ONLY FOR THE BRIDE AND GROOM. Your cousin who’s wedding you want to out do? Not for her. Your non married aunt who has an exact vision for your big day because she never had one(🌴)? Not for her either. Your by-the-book bestie who has all the rules of etiquette that you should follow for a wedding? Nope. 

If by the book is your thing, that’s perfect…for you. Now I will admit that at one point I ventured into the dark abyss of trying to please others with our decisions but was brought back to the light by the gloom, despair, and the “f#ck this wedding” attitude that was looming over my head. 

Here are the top 6 rules that we decided to ignore.

1. A TRADITIONAL OFFICIANT. Nope. One of my good, long time friends is Justice of the peace and who better to wed you than someone who truly believes in your love…and can party with you afterward.


3. THE ALL INCLUSIVE GUEST LIST. As controversial as it may seem, we had to cut ALOT of family. We both have huge out of state families and if we invite one, we gotta invite ’em all! And unfortunately, that comes with a price tag bigger than we want for our small celebration. But we know that our families will be praying over our union from afar. 

4. “WEDDING” ITEMS. Let me let you in on a little secret: Anything with the word “Wedding” in front will be 3 times the normal cost for absolutely NO. DAMN. REASON. We searched for a venue, photographer, dress, invites, and Caterer that have standard prices no matter what the occasion.

5. REGISTRY. In all honesty…we just couldn’t even think of what to register for. And I have a thing, IDK…it’s weird….*cough* moving on…

6. REHEARSAL DINNER. We’re skipping the fancy restaurant and going out to a club! …two nights before the big day. I’ll kill the groomsmen if my honey is drunk the day of. 

YOUR WEDDING IS FOR YOU AND YOUR FIANCE. And those are the only opinions and inputs that should hold significant weight! Now don’t get me wrong. I definitely asked my friends for advice and tips and appreciate them keeping me on track. And I’m not getting married while wearing a bikini or jeans or anything super crazy like that. But I can proudly proclaim that my fiance and I aren’t excluding or including anything that we don’t truly want in our wedding for the sake of others.  

***Disclaimer #2: There will be an update after the wedding to let you all know if it was all worth it…or an EPIC fail. Stay Tuned!

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